So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I got her a Nickelback box set.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
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