So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Randomize
