So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Randomize