If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
