I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
