He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
