May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
