omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Randomize
