god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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