dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize
