You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Randomize
