I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
