Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
This toilet bowl is my home.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Randomize
