hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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