his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Randomize
