If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
