do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Randomize