I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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