so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
