My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
