somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
