What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Randomize