I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
