If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
