Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Randomize
