Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
