walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
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