what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
