therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
