Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
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