I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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