I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Randomize
