Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
