About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
