if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
