At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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