yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
