i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
as a side note pls kill me
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
