she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
