you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Randomize
