What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
a search helicopter?!
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Randomize
