that's an acceptable place to lick
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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