farters have to be the big spoon...
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
The struggles of a small town man whore
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
