tell your sister to shave her snatch
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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