I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Randomize
