Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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