I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
it glows. i had to have it.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Randomize
