$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
