How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
