after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Randomize
